I've been a bit on edge today, for several reasons. I am a worrier, seriously. I want everything to work out just so, but I don't want to have to do anything outside my bubble to get to the end of the road. My life will turn out alright and it will all be smooth and lovely and I won't be forced out of my comfort zone. Today I was jerked into reality by a well-meaning brother encouraging me to prepare for the future and my little castle in the air crashed in an undignified heap to the floor. Life apparently is not all roses and sunshine. (I sure wish someone had told me that before...) So, needless to say, I was beginning to worry and obsess over what on earth I was going to do with my life and how on earth I would make money and why wasn't life just handed to me on a silver platter anyway? I got pretty tense, and uncomfortable, and fidgety and I was beginning to ache all over physically...
And now I am listening to soft music reveling in the arms of Jesus and thinking, I'm crazy. Why worry? Yes, I do need a plan, I do need to be prepared. No, I do not need to worry. Wherever He takes me along this road it will be good. (Whether I think so or not) He will always take care of me. And if He wants me out of my bubble, He'll help me through whatever it takes to get to that point. I do not need to worry. So now instead of obsessing and freaking out over the future, I'm going to sit back and let Him take the controls. And whatever He calls me to do I pray I'll have the strength to follow. I know He will be my strength and my guide.
I was on edge, and consequently in some pain, but now I am resting in His strong arms and I am filled with peace. I feel so very refreshed and relaxed and loved and peaceful...it is hard to describe this glorious feeling.
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